Wow! That did not go very good at all. You just got home from yet another date with some guy that didn’t live up to even the most basic of your expectations. It’s not your fault; you’ve been trying to find somebody new since the break up. But now you finally realize that the only thing that will work is to get your ex back.
Dating other people after a split is normal behavior and can be a good way to move on. However, if your ex is all you can think about during those dates, then it’s time to look into ways of getting back together with your ex.
So, you have decided you are going to try to patch things up. Okay, nothing wrong with that. Because you are going to be working things out with your ex, you need to stop dating other people. While there isn’t anything wrong with dating others, it takes too much of the time and energy you’re going to need in your efforts to get back together with your ex.
Now that you have cleared your slate, you need to work on yourself a bit. This means maintaining your self respect. The worst thing you can do is trying to constantly talk to your ex. This will make you look needy and emotionally fragile, and that will only serve to push your ex further away. Promise yourself you will not try to contact your ex in any way for at least two weeks, with four weeks being even better.
The next step is to write down all of the things you can think of that you like about your ex. The problem is that emotions run high after a break up. This includes anger toward your ex. You won’t be able to get your ex back if you have conflicting feelings about them. Getting them back requires focus. So, you may as well start focusing on the positives about your ex, and start having positive expectations about getting back together.
Let’s skip ahead and assume you are now back together. Now the focus is to keep your renewed relationship running along as smoothly as possible. One way to do this is to create new situations that the two of you can enjoy. The trick is to keep from falling right back into the old habits that led to your break up in the first place. Yes, you are trying to rekindle a previous relationship, but you also have to make sure you’re not setting it up to fail like the old one did.
Finally, you need to understand that it isn’t always going to be easy trying to get your ex back. However, if you really love them, and you are 100% convinced that the two of you were meant to be together, then it will be more than worthwhile to do whatever it takes.